It's been a long week. I've been planning a family reunion, getting ready for Sweety's 1st b-day, (Sat, the 28th) training for my next 5k, helping to negotiate some tricky family business, and a few other things. I just ran out of childless time and didn't want to give up anymore sleep, (Oh! How I love my sleep!) so blogging went out the window.
I feel like I've spent the entire week on the computer and the phone. My kids have been insanely patient with me. They're not very good at
entertaining themselves yet, but they both did a fantastic job this week.Alright, enough of that. I love googling images, can you tell?
My mother's grandfather homesteaded several hundred acres along the Mogollon Rim in Arizona. When he died my grandmother received a share and built some cabins and spent every minute there that her life would allow.
My mother grew up spending her summers there, and so did I. This piece of earth is sacred to me. It's much more important to me than the home I was raised in. When at 'the ranch,' every where I look I see the past, present, and future. I feel deeply connected to my ancestors and my posterity.
When my grandma died, she left her land to all of us. Those who pay dues (to cover taxes and expenses and such) have a vote and a right to the land. That is, they have a right to shape it's destiny. All Grandma's descendants have a right to use.
We are currently recovering from making a very difficult decision. There were some major disagreements, my family is passionate, but most people were willing to look at all sides and attempt objectivity. But there was some aggression and some seriously hurt feelings.
This isn't the first time this kind of thing has happened, but it gets worse each time, and I'm not sure that all will fully recover from this episode. I'm sick of this kind of behavior. I hate being forced to "fight" for a side. So my question is, when do I pull out of the trust in order to save my relationships with my cousins? I ache when I think about giving up my right to this land, and they need my share of dues, but people should be more important than things, even important things.
Aargh, is it too late to choose not to make grown-up decisions at all? Can I just go back to being a care-free ten year old, playing my time away at the ranch and never worrying about this stuff?
2 comments:
Lynn.
the flake ranch? Where you have to be a flake, or know a flake to go? (We would love it when Dave would say that...) Anyway, sadly, I know how things like this happen. Ours blew up when grandma couldnt live alone anymore and no one but us would take her. You would have thought they would be grateful and give weekends off...but nope. Things were said and done, and even though grandma is gone, I dont think many of the cousins talk (well, unless you were on each others "side") Good luck and big hugs! Its not fun to be the grown-up! Sometimes I wish I could be 10 again too!
Good luck with that, those family disagreements are tough. I think all families have those kind of arguments.
It looks like our boys have the same birthday, Matthew turns one on saturday too. How cool is that!
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