Sweety's First Birthday

Sweety recently turned 1 year old! Join our celebration:

The cake, clearly created by a confectionery genius.
(Sorry it's sideways)

We practiced blowing out candles but, when the big moment came, Sweety froze and we called in a pinch-hitter

After some convincing, Sweety decides he is interested in the cake

Really interested

Hey Smarty, how old is Sweety today?

Presents!

Thanks, pinch-hitter

Dad and the main man

Phew! Birthdays are hard work!

Ok. Here's a picture of Sweety at his blessing party in August when he was just over a month old. Notice the outfit in this picture and the one above with Dad. Yep that's right. It's the same one.

Hurry up endocrinologist, and tell us what to do!!! In the mean time, thanks everyone for the new clothes. I am so ready for changes in this kid's wardrobe. ;)

Gotta Crawl Before You Can Walk...

Both of my boys are/ were far more interested in walking than crawling. Smarty did the army crawl for 3 months before walking, but he only pushed up to his hands and knees like three weeks before walking. Sweety is following suit. He loves to pull himself up to a standing position. He loves to hold on to someone’s hands and lift his knees and toes clear to his chest. He looks like he’s marching. But he really doesn’t care much for the crawling idea.

I’ve run into a few moms of apraxic kids that say their kids weren’t way into crawling either. It stands to reason, I guess, when you consider all of the motor skills involved. Your brain has to communicate with opposite hands and feet, at the same time, and then immediately switch to the other hand and foot. Not to mention all of the core strength involved with this task.

Sweety’s P.T. says that crawling is so important for those very reasons. It’s great for using both sides of the brain at the same time, and strengthening all the muscles of the body. She says it’s also great for depth perception, because it forces them to explore everything close-up.

I’ve heard the old-wives’ tale that it messes people up if they don’t learn to crawl before they walk. Sweety’s P.T. doesn’t buy it. She says they may be less motivated to learn to crawl if they can walk around. But they won’t loose the benefits as long as they master it at some point. She said we will just have to go on family crawling trips all around the house together. (Woo-hoo; can’t wait for that)

I'm Ba-ack!

It's been a long week. I've been planning a family reunion, getting ready for Sweety's 1st b-day, (Sat, the 28th) training for my next 5k, helping to negotiate some tricky family business, and a few other things. I just ran out of childless time and didn't want to give up anymore sleep, (Oh! How I love my sleep!) so blogging went out the window.

I feel like I've spent the entire week on the computer and the phone. My kids have been insanely patient with me. They're not very good at entertaining themselves yet, but they both did a fantastic job this week.

Alright, enough of that. I love googling images, can you tell?



My mother's grandfather homesteaded several hundred acres along the Mogollon Rim in Arizona. When he died my grandmother received a share and built some cabins and spent every minute there that her life would allow.

My mother grew up spending her summers there, and so did I. This piece of earth is sacred to me. It's much more important to me than the home I was raised in. When at 'the ranch,' every where I look I see the past, present, and future. I feel deeply connected to my ancestors and my posterity.

When my grandma died, she left her land to all of us. Those who pay dues (to cover taxes and expenses and such) have a vote and a right to the land. That is, they have a right to shape it's destiny. All Grandma's descendants have a right to use.

We are currently recovering from making a very difficult decision. There were some major disagreements, my family is passionate, but most people were willing to look at all sides and attempt objectivity. But there was some aggression and some seriously hurt feelings.

This isn't the first time this kind of thing has happened, but it gets worse each time, and I'm not sure that all will fully recover from this episode. I'm sick of this kind of behavior. I hate being forced to "fight" for a side. So my question is, when do I pull out of the trust in order to save my relationships with my cousins? I ache when I think about giving up my right to this land, and they need my share of dues, but people should be more important than things, even important things.

Aargh, is it too late to choose not to make grown-up decisions at all? Can I just go back to being a care-free ten year old, playing my time away at the ranch and never worrying about this stuff?

"Brothers Gotta Hug!"

My guys were extremely squirrelly in church today, and Ben wasn't able to help. I was thinking, "Blegh! These moments make me crazy!" when Sweety, who was sitting in my lap, leaned over, clasped Smarty's head in his chubby little hands, and gave Smarty his best attempt at a hug. Smarty is so perceptive; he understood perfectly and attempted to reciprocate. (Not easy considering Sweety was practically sacked out on his head) I believe that's the first time Sweety has tried that. It was the most beautiful (and awkward) little embrace. My heart just melted, people!

I wish I had a picture to show you all, but I don't, so I'll inflict another cute moment upon you instead.This was taken when Sweety was about a month old and Smarty was 2. Smarty was afraid to touch Sweety at this point. But he used to sit or lay just like this, just next to the blanket, like he was guarding him.

Finally, Some Wisdom to Impart Upon the World

I'm really grateful for the opportunity to blog. It's not often that I reach an epiphany worthy of a platform, but today I have some wisdom to deliver from my soap box here. We learned something truly important this week. Here it is: pouring milk on your keyboard will not improve it's ability to function, quite the opposite it turns out.

On Wed. my cute hubby was dutifully reading this very blog and eating breakfast. Apparently, as is often the case with men, the multitasking was too stressful. Long story short-- it made for some interesting computing!

We've received many-a-jab for our messages that omitted certain keys. Here are a couple of comments that we left on another blog:

very
mice
pamts!
my
keyoard
is
all
screwed
up
I
spilled
milk
om
it
yesterday
woops!
I
kamt
evem
Spell
my
mame
correctly
mow!

If+only+we+could+all+wear+pants+that
cool!+You+Must+be+so+proud!+Sorry+
about+my+dumb+keyboard.

[Taken from "Beacuse I Knew You..."]

Lovely! This adventure has made me thankful for all of the appliances and gadgetry that just run properly all the time and facilitate my life. I don't even have to think about most of it. Yeah for things that work!

My brilliant, mechanically-minded husband was able to take it all apart and clean it, so now it works perfectly again.

Sweety, the Funny Stylist

Sweety just pushed through tooth number four! I wonder what that little mouth must feel like!

It's so nice to hear that other people have picky eaters too. Thanks to those of you that 'fessed up. I guess misery loves company in this case.

So yesterday we were running some errands and Smarty fell asleep. He was leaning just close enough to Sweety's car seat for Sweety to touch him. So as we drove around town Sweety played with Smarty's hair. I was finding this all rather humorous when Smarty actually began to laugh out loud- in his sleep! It was hilarious! Sweety found it rather amusing too. Thanks to Smarty for entertaining Sweety the whole way home.

This reminds me of something worth noting. When Smarty was younger than two and primarily signing, not speaking, he used to sign in his sleep all the time, just the way that he talks in his sleep now. I assume he would sign about whatever he was dreaming about. His signs ranged from 'Daddy' to 'eat' to 'Elmo' and lots of other stuff. Come to think, he's always been a one-man show while sleeping. One day we'll have to have you all over to watch!

Complacency, Excuses vs. Pushing Too Hard!

Guess what y'all...
Sweety is cutting a third tooth!! (bottom, middle, left) Did you do the math? That's 3 in 5 days! Holy bananas! He's really being a trouper about it though. Keep 'em comin' Sweety!


Okay, on to other matters. As a mother, I constantly worry about finding the middle ground. I think it's so easy to jump to the extremes of most any issue, but it seems that more often than not, the best approach is somewhere in the middle.

At the moment I am trying to find the place where my children's issues are challenges and obstacles to overcome. Obviously this is not a conflict limited to families with apraxia or other conditions. We all bump into difficulties. I absolutely want to avoid being complacent and debilitating my kids by making excuses for them, but there is the other hand too.

Yesterday Sweety did speech therapy, and today he did physical therapy. Both times we worked really hard, and he was warn out and crying by the time the therapist left. Where's the point where I go from healthy encourager to slave driver?

I'm still totally in the dark on this with regard to Smarty's terrible fear of food. I know so many adults who hate certain foods because they were forced to eat them as a child, but Smarty can't survive on Pediasure and snack foods forever! Can he?

Blagh! It makes me crazy!

I'm Tech Challenged

I just need to apologize to those of you whose links I've messed up in my blog roll. I thought the new link list feature would be awesome, but apparently it's smarter than I. I'll work on it some more tomorrow. Lots 'o love!

Smarty Dips a Toe Into the Pool of Commerce

We're so proud of Smarty for working hard enough and saving enough money to buy this dang toy. (He already has like 8 shake 'n go cars. Did he really need to get another?) But I just have to smile at how independent he thinks he is.

He earned his money by doing chores, so basically we started paying him to do the things he was supposed to be doing anyway. (i.e. brush teeth, put away toys, ect.) And lets face it, 3 year olds are not known for their ability to stay on task, I'm pretty sure that we earned that money as much as he did. Then at .5 cents per chore we thought it best not to ask him to save all $14 for the above toy. We wanted him to be able to play with it while it was still age appropriate so we only asked him to save $5. Obviously we payed the shipping, we will continue to provide the batteries to run it, and we will help him learn how to take care of it so it will last.

Don't get me wrong, this experiment did just what we hoped it would. Smarty doesn't beg for stuff at the store anymore, he feels empowered and in control of his ability to acquire what he wants, so clearly he has learned something about the 'value of a dollar.' He values his possessions more as well, and I think this toy will be especially treasured because of the sense of accomplishment associated with it.

The thing that surprises me is what this whole thing has meant to me. Smarty really didn't do much to buy the darn thing, but he certainly feels like he did. I've heard our relationship with our Heavenly Father compared to the relationship between a parent and a small child several times before, but this really drove it home for me. We do what is required of us and feel so capable and independent about it all, but really, God has provided everything we have including the opportunity to work so that we feel like we provided it. Plus I think he must chuckle at us playing 'grown-up.'

All right, I'm done waxing philosophical for the night. I just want to share one more thing with anyone that hasn't quit reading by now. All babies make specific sounds to communicate stuff, but my Sweety makes the funniest sound when he's coaxing for attention. He makes this short, sucking sound in the back of his throat over and over. I swear to you he sounds like a little donkey. Sometimes when he thinks his situation is dire and he's coaxing most seriously and urgently, I can't help but laugh, much to his chagrin. He has one solid word at this point, dada, or dat. Yeah, not mama, what the heck, right? Anyway, at the moment he's really into whispering dada. It's so cute and so tiny. I wish you all could hear it.

Right so that was like 4 things, but don't worry I'm done for now. Have a fantastic night/day y'all!

Sweety Turns Carnivore

So Sweety is finally cutting teeth! Both top-fronts are coming in at this moment, and he will not stop gnawing on everything! I couldn't be more pleased. I was beginning to wonder if he was going to skip teeth and go strait to the toothless-old-man thing.

I realize this is not a picture of a man, but I couldn't resist! Isn't she great?

I think Sweety gaining teeth has to be a good omen as far as his bone growth issues go.

[He is still pretty much this same size and shape. He hasn't gained any significant amount of weight or height since he was 4 months old. His bone age is probably only 3 months old. We're seeing a pediatric endocrinologist but no news yet on the cause or solution. (From May 29 blog entry)]

Any-who, I'm way excited to start feeding him a wider variety of foods. Yes I know I need to wait for a few more teeth before I can expect him to chew much more than cheerios and spaghettios and other types of 'ios. I really, really hope this means something good as far as bone growth goes. BLAST! I hate having to wait for info from doctors!

In My Defense (Ben Posted)

So I had spent the time to unplug the cords and change them around. I wiggled and jiggled the phone jack. I still had no dial tone. I just didn't plug my phone into the main box outside because I couldn't find my cord phone. I called the phone company and they said they detected a problem. They told me that it could be $85 and I was sure that it wasn't a problem on our side (little did I know). The guy came and breathed on the cord for the phone and it started working. He simple demolished that cord and left. Not explaining why the computer didn't get a good phone signal either. The phone was working when he left. It ended up being a broken black wire on the back of the jack that I put in when we moved in. Double-self-inflicted! AAAAARRRRGGGGGG! yeah that sucks. If you need some money thrown away, leave it to me. I'm a pro.
Ben

How to Flush $100 in Less Than 30 Min!

Our phone has been on the fritz. And because I'm too cheap to pay for high speed, we've had no internet either. grrr... We finally broke down and called the repair guy. ggrrrrr! He showed up at a time not at all close to the 4 hours they asked us to earmark and said that our connection to the box was just fine. cha-ching, that cost $85! Then he decided that the wire connected directly to the phone was bad and snipped it into little bitty pieces.

I swear when he left, everything was working! A short time later I was off to Home Depot to replace the wire that was unnecessarily destroyed, ROAAR!!! and the wall jack that was apparently shorting in and out. grumble, grumble, complain My very capable husband was able to correctly diagnose and fix the problem. The worst part was that the repair guy said that we could have taken our own phone out to the box and tested the connection ourselves! #$*& #*$@&$#^!!! That would have been really great information to receive when we called in the first place!

So now we're sadder but wiser. There's a lesson to be learned here people!

Avoiding the Horror

Thanks to those of you who gave recommendations for beauticians that are great with kids. We actually know a wonderful women who has a son with problems of his own. She does a fantastic job with my boys, and I would be happy to recommend her to any of you. But due to the gas and grocery pinch we're all feeling, we are cinching things up a bit at our house.

Thanks also to Hershy's (or whomever) for M&M's, or we never would have survived!

Oh, and thanks to Karma for the tiny scratch on my left, rear quarter panel acquired at Walmart on Saturday. I knew there had to be a catch for getting a stall close to the door!

Life Lessons

Here are a few things life has taught me:
Motherhood is not a job for people-pleasers

Credit does not equal cash

Its a long, hard journey for some to bear children; some never get to have them at all. Children are priceless; they are treasure, and should be treated as such.

Waiting for companionship will only bring about more waiting

And here is my life's phylosophy:
Happiness is a choice, not an event. Success is a goal, not a gift or a right. Victims have no power; people who act have plenty.

Haircutting Horror

We've talked about my poor little boys' sensory issues before, and my heart goes out to them. I can imagine how they must perceive the snipping, combing, and gently tugging. Then there's the clippers! But what can I say; they've got to have their hair cut! So here you are...

Before:


After:


Need I say more?

But here's something fun:



Now you've all witnessed the first time Smarty has managed to put a shirt on right side up, right side out, and front facing front; and all by himself. Yes he is a snappy dresser. Don't you love the collar shirt underneath?

A Red Letter Day at Our House

As if the previously posted story wasn’t enough to make this a great day. Here comes some really fun news! After writing about Smarty’s eating habits I decided it was time to try chocolate chip pancakes again. Smarty was excited by the ch. chips, but I was skeptical as chocolate hasn’t been enough of a motivation in the past. (Unlike me, I’d do just about anything for chocolate, especially now that I’m on Weight Watchers!)

But Smarty cheerfully helped me measure and pour and stir. Some anxiety popped up a little later, but we worked through it and soon, he was scarfing silver dollar-sized pancakes and laughing at my exaggerated attempts to pick my jaw up off the floor! I think he ate 5 or 6 in all, a record smashing performance by anyone’s standards!

As for little Sweety, today was his first official physical therapy session. His core and arms are still not strong enough to enable him to crawl and do other proactive things. However, we are grateful that his legs are strong. He is getting good at cruising furniture and alternately picking up his feet.

Any-who, this week has been tough enough on Sweety. We had strep at our house a couple of weeks ago, and he hasn’t wanted to give up the being held and cuddled 24-7 thing. Also, I’ve had to start weaning him off me, totally against his wishes. Needless to say, Sweety, has been a little unhappy this week.

I was a little nervous because anyone who has undergone therapy knows it’s a grueling experience. I was worried about how the session would go with so much baggage attached. As it turns out, my worrying was unwarranted. (I know, it usually is) Sweety was awesome. He complained about each exercise, but he worked very hard and calmed himself down really well in between. He was such a trouper!

So today I’m busting my buttons. I’m dang proud of my great little boys!

Proof That the World Isn’t Completely Corrupt!

Phew! Thank heaven for considerate people.

Today I pulled into a parking stall next to a shiny, black Lexus. I drive a Camry, and anyone who owns a Camry knows that the doors swing open wonderfully wide. I used to really love that, but I’m having second thoughts now. Sure enough, as I innocently stepped out of my car, the wind ripped the door out of my grasp and slammed it into the perfectly glassy side of this beautiful car! Trust me, the foot long powder blue stripe didn’t increase the appeal of the Lexus.

I later confronted the Lexus owner and promised her my phone number, so that I could pay for a buff and whatever else she needed. She thanked me for my honesty (like anyone could sleep with a boo-boo that big plaguing their conscience) and insisted it would come right out.

My eyes don’t function quite like they used to, but I’m not blind, so I plead my case again. The woman licked her thumb and began to rub the stripe. No dice; it didn’t change a thing. She licked her thumb again and began to rub the stripe with a fair amount of gusto. The stripe almost laughed.

Then this sweet woman smiled up at me, with all the confidence of a lie-detector operator and said, “See that? It’ll come right out, no problem.” At this point I’m wondering if she thinks I’m stupid. I renewed my offer once more, and she replied, “Look, I’m not going to take money from a young family, under any circumstances, as long as I can help it.” After that she hopped in her blemished chariot and drove away before I could argue further.

What a woman. What a giving human being. Whoever she is, she will have my eternal admiration and gratitude. I wish her all the good things life has to offer and thank her for her fine example.

Will Smarty Ever Eat Human Food?

Thanks to everyone for your comments about potty-training. I think the overall message was to relax. It's true that Smarty is only 3 and won't be starting first grade anytime soon. So aside from the money we pour into Huggie's banks, there's no reason to get it done immediately. Good advice! I definitely have a tendency to freak out about stuff and worry too much. Thanks for the perspective.

All right, roll up your sleeves people, here comes my next plea for help. Smarty has had some real sensory issues. Any unordinary sensation used to be difficult for him. He used to cry any time someone around him coughed or sneezed, sometimes a yawn was too much. Vacuuming with him around was totally out of the question. He has really improved there, he still hates a blender or drill, but has learned to cope with it.

Touch used to be a real problem too. He didn't even like the feel of fleece. If we took off his shoes and put his feet in a cold, sandy, lapping river, it was enough to induce panic. Thankfully we had a great occupational therapist working with him for a while. He has overcome a lot of that too.

Here's the lingering problem. He still struggles with most foods. He eats anything dry, hard, and crunchy. He likes chips, pretzels, nuts, ect. He also likes things that are really viscous like yogurt, pudding, applesauce. He will eat fruits that are dry to touch on the outside like apples, raisins, and bananas, but that's about the limit. He is tolerant of granola bars and nutrigrain-type bars. Aside from an occasional sweet roll or piece of cake he won't eat any bread-like textures; meat and pasta are totally out of the question.

Presentation makes a huge difference. The less home-made it is, the more strait-from-the-package it is, the more interested he is. Involving him in the cooking process doesn't help much. Sometimes he wants to help, sometimes he doesn't, but it doesn't seem to affect his interest in food. We have the most success when food appeals to him visually. If it doesn't pass his eyeball exam, there's no way he's willing to touch or smell it, let alone taste it. No reward or punishment will motivate him. He was in a food class for a while and made some progress there. Peer pressure seemed to help a little, but that class isn't available to him anymore.

Here is Smarty at his first birthday party. It took quite a bit of coaxing to get him interested in that cake.

Everyone says to me, "Just let him get hungry, children won't starve." That is a myth. Smarty once held out for two full days over some chocolate chip pancakes. I promise this is not a matter of defiance. The message he sends back during these encounters is genuine fear of what's in front of him, and a plea for what he believes is 'real' food. He is perfectly submissive, not defiant. He's just terrified to put offending foods in his mouth. Thank heaven he likes Pediasure, or I literally think he would die of malnutrition.

Like with potty-training, I hope that some time and maturity will help. Perhaps the influence of his younger brother might be beneficial, but in the mean time, any bright ideas?